So we’ve made it through another week. Our weekends are rarely very busy. Both Lee and I tend to be more homebody than social butterfly and Violet is really still too young to be carting her out and about all weekend.
This was our Saturday…
6:50am – I try to let Lee sleep in a little later on the weekends. My body clock has me up around 6:30am regardless so I’ll usually just come out into the living room, make myself a coffee and hang out here quietly until Violet wakes up.
6:52am – I have the sudden realisation that it’s been raining overnight. I love the rain. I’m definitely more of a winter person than a summer person.
7:06am – Violet’s medicine. She was diagnosed with reflux when she was about 7 weeks old. Since then she’s been on two 1ml doses of this medication per day.
7:16am – Lee seems to get up at about the same time Violet does on the weekends. I can see from watching him that he loves going in to her in the morning and spending that little bit of early morning happy time hanging out with her on the couch.
7:23am – A bottle of milk for Violet and a coffee for Lee.
8:03am – Once she’s had her bottle of milk, Violet has playtime in the jumper activity centre until it’s time for her morning nap. Over the last couple of days she’s figured out that a couple of the pieces in the back can actually be pulled out. Naturally the first thing she does when she gets in there now is to pull them out and play with them / chew on them.
8:04am – Breakfast. A mixed berry smoothie.
8:05am – Ella looks sad, though I’m sure she’s not. She has this funny little way of sitting with her back pushed right up against the base of this couch. Today I think she’s enjoying the smell of Lee’s dressing gown which is draped over it.
9:56am – After some gentle prompting by Lee, I finally manage to drag myself off to the gym again. Today I just do some running / walking intervals.
Before I fell pregnant with Violet going to the gym was a big part of my daily routine and I absolutely loved it. Although I still had some weight to lose, overall I was in pretty good shape. I joined the gym again when she was about three months old and for a while there I had a pretty decent rhythm going. Then Lee went back to work and things got tough with Violet and I lost all motivation to go. And as a result (combined with my poor food choices) what muscle I did have has been replaced by fat so I’m all jiggly and wobbly and totally unhappy with the way that I look and feel. But even with that, I’m still struggling to find the motivation to do something about it.
10:36am – Right after I’m done at the gym. Sweaty and with a bright red face that nearly matches my top.
2:15pm – Today I have a relatively rare opportunity to get dressed into something nice and head out for a late lunch with some girlfriends.
2:58pm – A glass of pinot noir at The Cabin. It’s nice to see so many of my female friends, this isn’t something I do very often.
I’ve always struggled a little bit in social situations and with maintaining relationships. There have been a few events or incidents throughout the course of my life that have contributed to this. I have a tendency to spend too much time in my head, worrying and fretting. Conversation and social interaction doesn’t feel like it comes naturally to me and I find connecting with other people to be kind of tough. When I’m sober I overthink things and have difficulty trying to determine what the right thing to say is. When I’ve had a few drinks, I am more relaxed but I also tend to say the wrong things without really thinking.
Today I’m feeling a little bit fragile and these feelings of social inadequacy and awkwardness are really hitting hard so I have to try really hard to not retreat into myself and sit in silence (or allow myself to get upset and cry).
3:01pm – By the time I got my lunch I was absolutely starving. Although this popcorn fried chicken was pretty tasty, it wasn’t really enough to satisfy my hunger.
6:22pm – I am feeling a little bit emotionally drained and in need of a pick me up. So I get out my Roger Waters – In The Flesh DVD, the concert that introduced me to Doyle Bramhall II. I haven’t played this concert in a very very long time. I used to have it on at least once a week. The DVD itself is looking a little worse for wear.
6:26pm – Dinner. Pub-style chicken parmigiana served with a simple side salad.
6:38pm – Saturday nights we usually have cocktails and tonight Lee has a hankering for Margaritas. I could never turn down a margarita.
7:38pm – Lee comes out from the bedroom wearing my dressing gown. Because apparently his touched the side of the toilet and now can’t be worn until it has been washed. Another endearing quirk.
7:52pm – Saturday night is our movie night (because it’s pretty much the only night we allow ourselves to stay up past 9pm!). Tonight we are watching Deadpool. Great movie!